Here, it's like - it's this vise, I don't know, I just - keep thinking I'm okay and going to be fine and then I ruin something. And all of a sudden there are a bunch of things that if I ruin them, I'll lose it. So I have to keep all of them going but there's this choice that's looming over me. There's always choices.
You're making choices, you chose not to kill me. You chose not to kill her, either. And I'm glad you didn't, but - part of me's not. Part of me thinks I shouldn't have trusted you, part of me -
[A beat.]
You show me things that I think are important. So I don't want you to die. I want you to adapt. I want you to stay. But that's - I'm not good at knowing what's right.
[Dean said: you just know. Right now, he doesn't.]
If I made the wrong choice, telling Charles - I'm sorry. But I don't think I did.
private/voice; cw: thoughts of suicide
Here, it's like - it's this vise, I don't know, I just - keep thinking I'm okay and going to be fine and then I ruin something. And all of a sudden there are a bunch of things that if I ruin them, I'll lose it. So I have to keep all of them going but there's this choice that's looming over me. There's always choices.
You're making choices, you chose not to kill me. You chose not to kill her, either. And I'm glad you didn't, but - part of me's not. Part of me thinks I shouldn't have trusted you, part of me -
[A beat.]
You show me things that I think are important. So I don't want you to die. I want you to adapt. I want you to stay. But that's - I'm not good at knowing what's right.
[Dean said: you just know. Right now, he doesn't.]
If I made the wrong choice, telling Charles - I'm sorry. But I don't think I did.
[His third apology today.]