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patheticvillain) wrote2015-03-23 01:16 pm
patheticvillain) wrote2015-03-23 01:16 pm
fifty ➢ video ( cw bodyhorror )
video
This is bullshit.
["This" being the black, silky ears he's sprouted in the wake of the flood. His long tail, equally black and twitching with irritation, pokes out from under his blanket, where he's curled up and sulking. The camera's at a skewed angle, balanced on the edge of his pillow.]
I just woke up like this. I didn't even do it. If it's gonna happen, I want to at least be the one to do it. I want . . .
[He trails off, his eyes distant and dull. When they snap back into focus, he sits up slowly, blankets falling around him, and narrows his eyes.]
It's supposed to hurt.
[And then he begins to change: skin rippling, body changing, limbs twisting. He grows a third arm, and then a fourth, the new ones vestigial, skinless, ugly. Growths emerge across his face, limning his high cheekbones. He curls up in the fetal position; you can hear bones crack, shift, curl, and break. All the while he's crying out in a dog's whine, an ugly helpless yet somehow angry noise. The blankets tangle around his shifting feet as they grow bark and tentacles and recede into stubs.]
[Eventually, endlessly, he is still. The ears and tail have gone completely.]
This is bullshit.
["This" being the black, silky ears he's sprouted in the wake of the flood. His long tail, equally black and twitching with irritation, pokes out from under his blanket, where he's curled up and sulking. The camera's at a skewed angle, balanced on the edge of his pillow.]
I just woke up like this. I didn't even do it. If it's gonna happen, I want to at least be the one to do it. I want . . .
[He trails off, his eyes distant and dull. When they snap back into focus, he sits up slowly, blankets falling around him, and narrows his eyes.]
It's supposed to hurt.
[And then he begins to change: skin rippling, body changing, limbs twisting. He grows a third arm, and then a fourth, the new ones vestigial, skinless, ugly. Growths emerge across his face, limning his high cheekbones. He curls up in the fetal position; you can hear bones crack, shift, curl, and break. All the while he's crying out in a dog's whine, an ugly helpless yet somehow angry noise. The blankets tangle around his shifting feet as they grow bark and tentacles and recede into stubs.]
[Eventually, endlessly, he is still. The ears and tail have gone completely.]
no subject
[She takes in a deep breath like she wants to say more, but all that comes out is--] Why?
private
Why the fuck not?
Re: private
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private
[Like that's going to make her back down.]
private
Re: private
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Re: private
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Re: private
private
[But his voice cracks on the word. No, of course he doesn't want to be alone. He never has. How dare she use that against him?]
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I'm going to come to your room. I hope the door's open.
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[But then, as if a switch has been pulled, he relaxes into her arms, lets his pained limbs go limp, and hugs her tight around the neck, burying his face in her shoulder.]
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It's all right, Cassel. [She's not sure what's all right, but it can't be so bad as long as someone is around.]
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[He doesn't cry, even though he feels like it. He just feels hollow and emptied out, like there aren't any tears left in him.]
It never was and it never will be.
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[She doesn't let go, just shifts to rest her chin a little farther down his shoulder.]
But that gets tiresome to think after a while, doesn't it? [It did for her.]
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[She's got a point.]
But I can't make myself think anything else.
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[She smiles faintly at the wall over his shoulder. When she pulls back, she runs a hand through his hair.]
Never is a very long time.
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[He doesn't. He's never thought enough, in his opinion. Before he graduated, he was always told he didn't think enough before he did shit. So it's only natural that he doubt Morgana now, no matter how much he cares about her, no matter how much he wants her to be right. The doubt's clear in his face as he pulls away.]