twenty-five ➢ private + spam

[patheticvillain]

private } chris

Hey.

private } vesper

sorry i scared you

spam } open. eeeeesh.

[Cassel spends the weekend and the first couple of days after Elena's outed pretty much just hiding in his room. He'll open the door to some people right away, some after a little persuasion, and completely ignore others.]

[After that, he starts picking up his shifts in the gym again, although he tends not to do much looking people in the eye. He can also be found scuttling away from social interaction in the dining hall.]

Comments

[spam]

[myironeyes]

[It's as alright as it can be, with everyone restored. They can pretend it's enough until it feels more true. His voice is mild, even warm.]

Perhaps a few things. But you aren't even close to being done.

[spam]

[patheticvillain]

I don't wanna be done.

[Even though he's tired and a little broken right now. He doesn't want to be done. This is his home now.]

I've never had - people I knew how to let in before. So I have to show somebody else how to do that before I can even think about being done.

[spam]

[myironeyes]

It has been a very long time since anyone - gave me things I needed.

[He chooses the words carefully, an echo of Cassel's non-optional offer from the port with the lightning fields, though it goes back earlier than that. Aster has been very good for him. Marsh is alright at letting a few people in, but letting anyone take care of him is another matter, because that's his job. Sazed tried, and Marsh didn't really cooperate. Cassel, however, didn't give him a choice in the matter at any point. He smiles, just a little, at the thought.]

I understand something of - debts that can only be paid forward. Just. Remember that you are a great deal more than useful.

[spam]

[patheticvillain]

[The beauty of it is that it's a new kind of useful - a kind that doesn't rely on being used. Not just that, but Cassel's discovered it almost completely by himself, the gradual melding of Zane's occasionally hamhanded affection, Chris's stubborn insistence on his own potential, and Kon's encouragement of expression.]

[None of which is the point. The point is, Cassel feels, just for this moment, like a good person. And Marsh is smiling.]

Thank you. [He's barely audible.] If I remember than, can you maybe remember that you deserve it? Having the things you need?

[spam]

[myironeyes]

[He'd - known, on some level, that he was leaving himself open to that, but he had simply been doing his best not to think about it, and vaguely hoping that Cassel wouldn't notice. He's not comfortable thinking about what he deserves at all, really, but he also can't say no.]

Brat.

[It's warm, with the sort of entirely fond sigh he usually reserves for Kelsier and then only when Kel isn't around to hear it.]

I'll try to - let myself. More.

[It's as much as he can offer.]

[spam]

[patheticvillain]

[He likes being a brat. He's very much okay with it. You only call someone a brat if you like them, or else what would be the point? His smile is wide now, and he shoves his hands in his pockets.]

I know I am. But people seem to like me that way.

It's good enough for now.